Monday, November 19, 2007

Birthday Update

Well, I hope the turnaround trend continues.... Some good fortune and a bunch of last minute coordination has turned things around.

Visitation

The court order does not grant me flexibility to schedule a birthday celebration that includes my other family members, its does grant me Thanksgiving Day every other year, but my ex has ignored the visitation schedule when it suits her without consequences. One of the reasons I was going to travel is because I would not be allowed to celebrate my birthday or Thanksgiving with my son, so traveling would have helped distract me from this NCP reality.

Well I got some unexpected gifts at the last minute. A major tactic to prevent my representation in court was defeated because my investment adviser claimed the court had no direct jurisdiction to circumvent their fiduciary responsibility to me. It pays to develop strong partnerships that will stand beside you in contempt for the contemptible family court. This may have been the trigger for the following two events, my ex broke up her long weekend plans to accommodate my son celebrating my birthday with my family. She also is giving me visitation on Thanksgiving day for the first time in a long time.

Each year I review the 4 conflicting parenting schedules, in the 35 page parenting order, apply the rules in a priority sequence and mark all the special rules on a calendar. In a few cases the order is so ambiguous that I mark more than one schedule in a day. Why is it this complex? Because the lawyers and Guardian drafted them that way. Why did I sign it? Because my ex's hired bitch faxed a threat to take away Christmas visitation last Christmas if I didn't sign it, just like the year before. I paid a few thousand in legal fees the first year to get the Christmas visitation that year, so last year I submitted to the hired bitch's extortion on advice of counsel and accepted the unacceptable overly complicated, overpriced, unusable parenting schedule.

So after checking my court calendar, I saw that in fact, I should have my son from 10am to 8pm on Thanksgiving, so this wasn't any special favor but compliance with the court order. So what did she do, follow the order to a T? Hell no, she is cutting my time short by 2 hours because the weather forecast calls for 2 inches of snow and that will increase her travel time. My suspicion is she wants to get him earlier to take him to her parents. And as usual, the NCP gets the short end of the stick.

My Son

At my son's class last week, the teacher wished me a good holiday and I said that it was my birthday too. So after their usual thank you of a class cheer, the whole class sang Happy Birthday to me. It was very cute. Oh and finally that PC that I diagnosed, was back in service.

Family Celebration

My brother has been involved in a very large project working many hours and it was unclear when we could get together. Well he came through and brought his family to my parents. My son and his cousin had a very good time together as usual. It was very nice to have the whole family together. We all had a very great time.

My ex

My ex asked what my dinner plans were for my birthday. I said well I have a couple of ideas, why do you ask. She cooked for my birthday "so I didn't have to go to McDonalds on my birthday". I responded, well I was thinking more upscale then McDonalds. Rather an odd comment, I think there was some subtle sarcasm implied. I am not a frequent visitor to McDonalds or any other fast food restaurant. I actually shop and prepare food. I'm no chef, I take advantage of shortcuts. I could have prepared something easy or gone to a medium scale restaurant with my son. There are three new restaurants in the area I was considering, None of them using infrared heating lamps.

So I accepted. It doesn't begin to fix the last three years, but I have no need to give her cause to call be ungrateful or who knows what.

So while my ex was making a birthday dinner for my son and I, my son decided that fresh baked cookies would be the natural addition to the meal and he even offered to help. So she made cookies with some help from my son too.

And we ate it all and suffered no ill effects. Wonders will never cease. LOL

Birthday Bummer

Well, how could my birthday pass without its usual bump. As a teenager, I had an accident that broke a front tooth, it wasn't capped, it was pinned and rebuilt, it wasn't expected to last over a decade, but it lasted several. Until my birthday when it finally gave way and broke, leaving a hole for the holidays. So the next day I called the dentist, expecting that I'd be sporting an odd smile for a while and guess what? More luck, when I called, they said they just got a cancellation and could get me in that day. So now I have my old smile back, just in time for a thankful Thanksgiving Day.

Thanksgiving

My son probably can not remember the last time he celebrated Thanksgiving with my family. Well this year he will finally have the chance.

Status: Actively Being Updated - Last Update 11/21/07 1am

4 comments:

Unknown said...

Amazing how a few merciful concessions from her can mean the world to you and your son! I'm so happy for you that you got to spend those important events with your son.

guttergirl said...

Something extra to be thankful for... time with your son. I am happy for you. Finally some good news. Enjoy it!

JQ75 said...

Thanks for stopping by, I'm glad I had some positive things to report.

I added a few wrinkles to the post, but still all in all it is good news.

GG, not only with my son, but my brother's family too. So, my son got to spend some time with his Uncle, Aunt and cousin. We always have fun together.

The visitation schedule also gives me Christmas Day and New Year's Day this year too. So if she abides by the orders, I have more good holiday times to look forward to.

Anonymous said...

Yay!!!! That's great!

Happy Birthday.