The media article I mention earlier was first jumped on by parent's rights groups who personally experience the devastation of the divorce industry. But it was only a matter of time before bleeding heart ignorants would jump on the bandwagon and weigh in with their uninformed views.
The word "deadbeat" as it applies to child support should be stricken from the language until the divorce industry who are the true deadbeats can get their shit together and make the word mean something. The word is applied to all fathers regardless of whether they are registered with the support agency and regardless of whether they truly owe any child support.
How could that be, it doesn't make sense! Now you are catching on.
You probably assume there is some competence in the divorce industry, that's the first mistake. The enforcement agency makes so many mistakes including simple arithmetic that their entire appeals process focuses only on arithmetic errors and is four months backlogged. WTF??? I shit you not!!!
Do a search on the deadbeat label just to see the screwups they've done to me. That's not even a complete list. Feel free to add your own in comments here.
So I whipped off another editorial reply to the uninformed as follows:
Bringing people to church to harass them about child support is not the answer for any town... Stop judges from bypassing CSEA (child support enforcement agency), disbar every single judge and divorce lawyer who does not understand and follow CSEA rules (that would be almost all of them). Stop judges from seizing child support funds and reallocating them to legal fees. My judge reallocated $10,000 held by CSEA to lawyer fees then CSEA labeled me a deadbeat for the judge's decision to steal from my child.
My question to this media station is why don't you dare report the real facts, are you too afraid of the political powers in this town? Sure you are, everyone is!
But the real problem with CSEA is all they do is brow beat those who are registered with them. The real deadbeats fly under their radar and they are never bothered for a penny, while CSEA squeezes the last dime out of honest fathers. CSEA is too lazy to track them down. I know of people who haven't seen a dime for a decade, but that's because CSEA won't bother to enforce against someone who simply ignores them, even when they know where they live.
So for those who would comment [to this media report], try some research in what is really going on, rather than trite generalizations. Spend a day at the court house talking to those sitting in the hallway [like assholes] while the judges and lawyers plunder what little they have. The judicial theft from children far exceeds anything that disagreeing parents would cheat them out of, the real deadbeats have jobs in the courthouse. They work 3 hours a day for over $100,000, they charge over $250 / hour to argue endlessly over trivia with the absent judge's blessing.
So save your uninformed opinions and investigate the facts.
Sunday, August 24, 2008
Saturday, August 23, 2008
Its not a contest
I am sometimes misunderstood. I write about the terrible experiences I have had in Domestic Relations Court, but I am under no delusions that I have had the worst experiences.
Quite the contrary, I know there are many more that have it worse than I, and I have great sympathy for them and hope they will share their advice as I share mine.
But not having the worst story, does not make my story superfluous, its not a contest, its what I know, its what I can write about passionately and answer for personally.
Another issue is gender. I am an NCP father, and much of the problem is directed at father's and I use that as an example many times. But I have learned during this blog that there are indeed many female victims of the system. So I hope everyone can translate what I write to be gender neutral. I understand and fully recognize that female victims exist and their plight is equally bad and unjust.
Someone posted a comment to this post on their terrible experience, rather than simply responding to them by comment, I will post their entire comment here with some of my thoughts.
Hey, you think you were robbed?
I did not even get child support for my son for 7 years,
most of which time I was unemployed due to the break down in our economy, loss of my main career (I had been a cop, but my son's father carefully crafted my demise there), and very little experience in any other type of work.
My average income during those 7 years was $15,000/ yr., and I had a second son to support, so I was supporting 3 people on $15K in the SF Bay Area. you do the math.
The father meanwhile was earning 6 figures as a cop, and another $645,000 in business income from his P.I. business. We were denied our rights to the child support because the judge said I decided to not take it from him anymore????? and had signed away my rights. sorry, but in CA, I had no rights to that money, or the ability to "sign it away".
Under the Family Code, child support is the child's money and no one can deny that money to the child. It took 7, count them, seven years of litigation to finally re-instate the child support, but the judge denied any retroactive pay, and just ran the support from current day forward, at that point my son was 14!! I had finally re-trained myself in another legal field, as a paralegal, and was making decent money, so our monthly check was rather small.
When I finally hit a point where I could no longer work due to my cumulative injuries from being a police officer, I was approved for SSI, a measly check of $610 a month. My child support was reduced by half of what it had been, $1200, and my son got a measly $600 for the next 3 years from a father who never saw him once, and now made over $1,000,000 in personal and business income.
My son should have been getting at least $2000 a month for all the years he was alive, and we got less than 1% of his father's income when state guidelines calls for it to be 25%. I paid for his braces, a $5,200 expense, all on my own, and was never reimbursed the %50 as per the law and our court order. I paid for all his glasses and basically all his medical care on my own. Again, never got the 50% reimbursement.
And now who is paying for his college? Me! We will never see another penny from that father, not a dime, as the child support is cut off effective the day my son my son graduates from high school, June 14th.
You like to bitch, I can see that,
but fathers are not the only ones who get robbed.
Status: First Draft - Response being updated - Last Updated 08/23/08 2:30 AM
Quite the contrary, I know there are many more that have it worse than I, and I have great sympathy for them and hope they will share their advice as I share mine.
But not having the worst story, does not make my story superfluous, its not a contest, its what I know, its what I can write about passionately and answer for personally.
Another issue is gender. I am an NCP father, and much of the problem is directed at father's and I use that as an example many times. But I have learned during this blog that there are indeed many female victims of the system. So I hope everyone can translate what I write to be gender neutral. I understand and fully recognize that female victims exist and their plight is equally bad and unjust.
Someone posted a comment to this post on their terrible experience, rather than simply responding to them by comment, I will post their entire comment here with some of my thoughts.
Hey, you think you were robbed?
Well yes I do, and I see you were too. The problem is too many people are robbed.
I did not even get child support for my son for 7 years,
Well that's one of the biggest problems, there are fathers going homeless paying child support to a mother who doesn't need it and there are other fathers with more than sufficient means not paying a dime. Kind of like our tax system.
most of which time I was unemployed due to the break down in our economy, loss of my main career (I had been a cop, but my son's father carefully crafted my demise there), and very little experience in any other type of work.
And that's another major problem, the divorce process can cripple someone's career in a variety of ways.
My average income during those 7 years was $15,000/ yr., and I had a second son to support, so I was supporting 3 people on $15K in the SF Bay Area. you do the math.
Well that's not much to live on in the first place and in the SF area that is a much larger problem with its higher cost of living.
The father meanwhile was earning 6 figures as a cop, and another $645,000 in business income from his P.I. business. We were denied our rights to the child support because the judge said I decided to not take it from him anymore????? and had signed away my rights. sorry, but in CA, I had no rights to that money, or the ability to "sign it away".
I have been amazed at the arbitrary nature, callous disregard, and apparent ignorance judges seem to display for the law they are charged with interpreting. When a judge became upset with a point I raised he threatened to arbitrarily double my child support to exceed my mortgage.
Under the Family Code, child support is the child's money and no one can deny that money to the child. It took 7, count them, seven years of litigation to finally re-instate the child support, but the judge denied any retroactive pay, and just ran the support from current day forward, at that point my son was 14!! I had finally re-trained myself in another legal field, as a paralegal, and was making decent money, so our monthly check was rather small.
Judges have an affinity for the status quo. Personally I think it is subconscious arrogance in not wanting to admit that they or another judge or lawyer may have been wrong. The idea of "temporary order" is a misnomer. Any order, once made, is likely to remain in effect no matter how ludicrous or obviously mistaken it may be.
When I finally hit a point where I could no longer work due to my cumulative injuries from being a police officer, I was approved for SSI, a measly check of $610 a month. My child support was reduced by half of what it had been, $1200, and my son got a measly $600 for the next 3 years from a father who never saw him once, and now made over $1,000,000 in personal and business income.
xx
My son should have been getting at least $2000 a month for all the years he was alive, and we got less than 1% of his father's income when state guidelines calls for it to be 25%. I paid for his braces, a $5,200 expense, all on my own, and was never reimbursed the %50 as per the law and our court order. I paid for all his glasses and basically all his medical care on my own. Again, never got the 50% reimbursement.
xx
And now who is paying for his college? Me! We will never see another penny from that father, not a dime, as the child support is cut off effective the day my son my son graduates from high school, June 14th.
xx
You like to bitch, I can see that,
Well if you want to call it that, but as I see it too many people are being too quiet about this bullshit, there should be more bitching, until this problem receives the attention it deserves.
but fathers are not the only ones who get robbed.
As I mention above, I don't always say it, but I do know it. It makes no difference what gender is robbed, it is bad. I just don't like to use dual he/she father/mother language. Sometimes I use gender neutral language like NCP.
Most of your problems are the opposite of mine as I am falsely labeled a deadbeat and you are the victim of a real deadbeat. I have heard some stories like this but can't write about them authoritatively. I encourage those, like yourself, who can to do that.
Our very different examples only go to prove one thing, the whole damn system is screwed up and it needs a major overhaul, no band aid will fix this hemorrhage of injustice (jqism).
Status: First Draft - Response being updated - Last Updated 08/23/08 2:30 AM
Friday, August 22, 2008
Deadbeats go to church to turn themselves in
I saw an article that just raised my ire... I had to comment on it. The article was about allowing child support "deadbeats" to turn themselves in at a church. If you've read this blog for any length of time you will realize that the process of naming "deadbeats" is very flawed. My editorial response follows...
How ironic that the church, historically a sanctuary for the falsely accused is being used to lure people in for prosecution. And the benefit to the person turning themselves in would be what? They won't be shot on sight, arrested in front of their children or at work? Wow what a great deal!
What a dysfunctional system! I've had judges allow raiding child support accounts twice when lawyers wanted it for their own fees, to the tune of well over $10,000 that judges ordered stolen from my child, and then label me a deadbeat because of the judges' orders, the same judge who works 3 hours a day while earning over $100,000, the same judge who will win a promotion to probate court unopposed because of his famous last name.
And you have the guts to call me a deadbeat? The domestic relations court, the judges who are in bed with the lawyers, the lawyers, the guardians, the custody evaluators who allow themselves to be intimidated against the father's parental rights, the whole damn corrupt system are the real deadbeats. They should be the ones turning themselves in for crimes against the people and against the family structure all in the name of personal greed.
The enforcement agency who can't even tell you how much you owe, who constantly finger points between county and state for their variety of screw-ups, who only take one day to trigger an automatic enforcement action, but over four months to schedule a hearing appeal and then deny you due process with all kinds of restrictions on how you can appeal their erroneous decisions is an agency that lives off the misery of the Non Custodial Parent (NCP) like a parasite, worse than any blood sucking leech.
And to the news media, is this the best you can do in your reporting? Don't you see the travesty, destruction and stink of corruption right under your noses? Are you so blind? Or do you, like the whole dysfunctional family destruction industry, just not give a damn either?
History will judge this era of family destruction very harshly, but then it will be way too late to close Pandora's box, all the destruction will have occurred marring our nation for generations. But I'm sure there is more important crap on the news or the front page, right? No, I don't think there is anything more important than the destruction of the family.
But who the hell am I, I used to be a Dad, I fought for over three years to stay one, but the court picks a winner and a loser, and I am the loser, I am the NCP. But there is one automatic loser, one that occurs in every single court decision, and that is the child, for they are no longer allowed to have two parents, only a "single" parent and a visiting NCP.
For thousands of years everyone knew it took two parents to raise a child, now in the 21st century we are destroying something that worked for millennia. So we can enrich the family court industry on the backs of the citizenry. That is not the government "of the people, by the people, and for the people" our nation was founded on over 200 years ago. The time is long overdue for a revolution to return the control of government to the people where it belongs.
How ironic that the church, historically a sanctuary for the falsely accused is being used to lure people in for prosecution. And the benefit to the person turning themselves in would be what? They won't be shot on sight, arrested in front of their children or at work? Wow what a great deal!
What a dysfunctional system! I've had judges allow raiding child support accounts twice when lawyers wanted it for their own fees, to the tune of well over $10,000 that judges ordered stolen from my child, and then label me a deadbeat because of the judges' orders, the same judge who works 3 hours a day while earning over $100,000, the same judge who will win a promotion to probate court unopposed because of his famous last name.
And you have the guts to call me a deadbeat? The domestic relations court, the judges who are in bed with the lawyers, the lawyers, the guardians, the custody evaluators who allow themselves to be intimidated against the father's parental rights, the whole damn corrupt system are the real deadbeats. They should be the ones turning themselves in for crimes against the people and against the family structure all in the name of personal greed.
The enforcement agency who can't even tell you how much you owe, who constantly finger points between county and state for their variety of screw-ups, who only take one day to trigger an automatic enforcement action, but over four months to schedule a hearing appeal and then deny you due process with all kinds of restrictions on how you can appeal their erroneous decisions is an agency that lives off the misery of the Non Custodial Parent (NCP) like a parasite, worse than any blood sucking leech.
And to the news media, is this the best you can do in your reporting? Don't you see the travesty, destruction and stink of corruption right under your noses? Are you so blind? Or do you, like the whole dysfunctional family destruction industry, just not give a damn either?
History will judge this era of family destruction very harshly, but then it will be way too late to close Pandora's box, all the destruction will have occurred marring our nation for generations. But I'm sure there is more important crap on the news or the front page, right? No, I don't think there is anything more important than the destruction of the family.
But who the hell am I, I used to be a Dad, I fought for over three years to stay one, but the court picks a winner and a loser, and I am the loser, I am the NCP. But there is one automatic loser, one that occurs in every single court decision, and that is the child, for they are no longer allowed to have two parents, only a "single" parent and a visiting NCP.
For thousands of years everyone knew it took two parents to raise a child, now in the 21st century we are destroying something that worked for millennia. So we can enrich the family court industry on the backs of the citizenry. That is not the government "of the people, by the people, and for the people" our nation was founded on over 200 years ago. The time is long overdue for a revolution to return the control of government to the people where it belongs.
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