And the winner is...

NOBODY!!!

When one party decides to play child custody games, everyone is a looser. If the system worked, the first incident of this would be greeted by mandatory inpatient mental health confinement until the offending party learned the folly of their ways. No instead, there is money to be made in these games, so there is an industry built up around supporting the custody abuser, insuring employment for all manner of magistrates, lawyers, guardians, evaluators, social workers, etc.

So it is simple math, BIC is statistically outnumbered by special interests who hurt children under the rhetorical banner of BIC. Oh sure its a lie, propaganda, but the trick is to keep repeating it and the constant dripping of the message will convince people.

So I knew no one would take my sucker bet, but the combined pressure from myself, my brother, the fact that my ex needs something in legal arena and the judge is denying it and that means she needs my cooperation (as I am Pro Se now) and I am not kissing her lawyer's ass as mine had was just enough incentive to almost get her to comply with the court order.

The key to being an NCP is to set your expectations low enough. To think that you, the NCP, the looser, could expect the winner, the residential parent, the only parent that matters to the system, to comply with asswipe orders is just not realistic. The very best you can hope for is close. You can also expect to have to fight for close which will cause you aggravation that you must conceal to prevent the self fulling prophecy of you being labeled a "poor litigant" with a "poor attitude", if you continue to push for what's right the system may retaliate by calling you "nuts", no one else is standing up for their rights so you must be "nuts" for doing so. Neat game, if your the winner.

So she only shorted my son by by one hour of visitation, a mere 10%. Not bad, 90% compliance with the law. My ex on the other hand had all of her visitation and extended it too, so she had 370%, which makes cheating me out of 10% seem all the more petty and unacceptable. Now if you don't have leverage or are not willing to put up with the aggravation, expect a much lower compliance level. You can not depend on the system to ensure compliance, only the good will of your ex in understanding the true meaning of BIC.

As an NCP, never expect to receive 100%, but do expect to give over 100%. (jqism).
Divorce court grief, the "gift" that keeps on giving. (jqism).