Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Search for the good...

Your mind can do many things, worry, ruminate or meditate. The later being more productive. In the midst of divorce your world seems like its collapsing. It's easy to see only the bleak, to fall so far that the daylight seems faint.

Reflect on good times, pray, listen for God's answer, plan, count your blessings. During a divorce, this isn't easy at all, but it is necessary.

A few years ago (during lent) in the height of nasty litigation that literally kept me up all night until I collapsed in fatigue, I participated in a retreat based on the teachings of St. Ignatius founder of the Jesuit order. I remember commenting to my group that I saw so much evil in the court system (ours is under state and federal investigation for corruption) that I could not see God's good anymore. Intellectually I knew it existed, emotionally I was blind to it.

St. Ignatius advocated seeing God's good in the world, in a sunset, in nature's beauty, in your fellow people. He also developed a set of spiritual exercises and discussed levels of prayer. We've all "talked at God", he advocated reaching a level where you quiet your mind and listen for his answer.

During this time it is easy to see evil, its all around us. It takes effort to search out the good in the world and to be comforted by it. It's easy for our lonely mind to ruminate on our misfortune, its hard to meditate and hear God's direction. It's easy to worry about the future, its hard to find the confidence to take control and direct it.

So when you are alone and tempted to worry, ruminate, and be depressed over your plight, work hard, struggle, to do something better with your solitude. If you can't, I understand, many times I have difficulty too, just keep trying. Even better, find some support to help you.

Best wishes on your journey...

PS: This is the season of lent and I just completed a 3 day Lenten Mission. It was good, but I long for more.

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