Do you know if you'll see your children for Christmas?
I Don't ! Not Yet, Maybe I'll know Thursday.
Last year, visitation was arranged only 1 week before Christmas. On Friday 12/23 I was notified that visitation would be withdrawn. I was so upset, I had to leave work immediately. Legal arguments continued until 12/24 at 5pm, when my visitation for Christmas Day was finally reinstated. One day visit, cost about $2000 in legal bills.
This year I started asking mid-November. I was promised a schedule on the Big Day 12/18. Didn't get it. Oh we can trust her, she'll review it the next day. She did, now there are more changes, but some litigation emergency has my lawyer tied up, so he won't get to it on Wednesday as expected, he's taking Friday off.
WTF? - Why not take care of it when it was before the court on the big day, when all parties were there, just 1 week before Christmas, why wait for someone who always delays, why trust someone who cluster-f--ks you? I let my hired a--hole off easy, with an apology, rather than calling the senior partner as planned. Well, I'll fix that in the morning. The boss can clean up the mess junior left.
A reader asks, how long can this go on. Remember, lawyers have a license to f--k with you. And some lawyers f--k right through the Holiday. As my lawyer told me on the Big Day, "we're getting cluster-f--ked, but I think we'll come out OK". He thunk wrong. And I pay over $200/hr for that thinking.
I ask my wife nicely, let's just take care of this now. NO!
Another year, another couple of grand wasted. Help me. Would I be better just telling my son I don't celebrate Christmas and banking the $2,000 in his name? In hind sight I think so. I'd give anything, if all this f--kin wasted money could have been put in his name.
Well actually, it wouldn't be that easy, I couldn't do that, her hired bitch already thought of that and named my son as defendant so she could control him too. After death where do mother's who sue to control their kids money go? After divorce where do father's go -- to an early grave.
Maybe I'll ask my parish priest tomorrow. It would be so much easier if I just wasn't around. Most "Deadbeat Dads" are beaten to death by the Disastrous Domestic Relations "process".
Merry Christmas, enjoy your kids, some don't get too.
Status: First Draft - Updated 3am
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5 comments:
My heart crys for you and your son. The hell that woman has put you both thru is un-fucking-believable. How can she actually believe she 'owns' that little boy and that this is right. She sounds to me like she has some serious mental issues, and maybe they should be addressed. How in the name of all things fair, can a judge not see her serious issues????
Thanks for the sentiment. Many readers are just speechless at the level of BS. But it really does help to see your encouragement.
She believes she owns him because in fact by law she does. I always heard the cliché that "procession is 9/10 of the law" and it really is true and it applies to children.
Funny you should mention that. She does. She stopped therapy and meds several years ago to establish herself as the perceived perfect parent. The court is not concerned with truth and reality it is too elusive. It is much easier to watch the orchestrated show and go with your gut about what seems to be right. And if in doubt, the mother is the default, because like other jurist traditions, it’s worked for centuries, why change now.
In fact during the course of her treatment, her repeated threats to kidnap my son, forced her therapist to break confidence and have a meeting where she was instructed in no uncertain terms that this threat was not to be acted on and waived her patient confidentiality.
I brought that up many times during the litigation, but just as adultery and other grounds for divorce, the court has no interest in that can of worms, every thing fits neatly under no-fault and I don’t live in California or a no-fault state. It’s just that no one files for cause because frankly the judges don’t care to hear it. Although oddly they’ll listen to all kinds of perceived legal mumbo jumbo that just pads the fees.
And with three days to Christmas, I do not know when I’ll see him.
Oh as for details on her mental state, anger management, long term vengeance, phobias (germs), panic (wind, loud noise, unexpected motion). Youngest & only girl, spoiled, always gets her way. She cycles through love/hate/abuse with those close to her (including immediate blood relations).
I saw my son today at the doctor. So far he seems he may turn the corner on vomiting, still very restricted diet but now he’s having chest congestion moving in.
Can you say, excellent actress and manipulator of people?
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