Math for Moron Lawyers

While I'm on the topic of computer use and lawyers, I might as well mention their other deficient skill - Spreadsheets.

I've mentioned this in a few other posts:

• Dumb and Dumber - Commingling mistake, columns are cheap, don't commingle. Offered assistance, lawyer was too proud to accept it.
  


• There's Big Bucks in Checking Your Lawyers Work - Cutting opposition fees charged to you, caring vs. carelessness, tax deductible by calling it alimony, misuse of Excel, saved $40,000 in one month by checking lawyers work.
  


• Lawyers can’t do math - Math done in text footnotes, careless errors, dated spreadsheet shows it was held back to cause delays.
  

Divorce Lawyers are equally inept with spreadsheets. Again just using the computer like a typewriter without regard to its proper use. Their spreadsheets are so inept that it probably isn't good to try to fix it. Get a copy just to prove their ineptedness. You most likely will need to design it from scratch. Extra work? Yes! But as I said in the above posts it can cost you serious bucks.

So what should you do that your lawyer won't?

• Design the spreadsheet
• Let the spreadsheet do all the calculations
  
• Use control and named cells
• Use variables rather than hard coded constants (eg split = 50%)
  
• Use extra (hidden) columns (or rows) to audit or calculate intermediate results
• Use the scenario manager rather than multiple duplicate sheets
• Use data validation and conditional cell formatting
• Use Audit Trace feature to validate correctness
• Don't commingle unlike funds (liquid/illiquid, different tax consequences, pensions, owed vs. controlled)
• Save each version
  

You are doing this to protect yourself, not to encourage your lawyer to slide out of his fiduciary responsibility to you.

You should consider outsourcing financial issues to a CPA trained in divorce issues, they are better trained in math.

And what should your lawyer be doing?

• All of the above !!!
• Learn how to use their computer efficiently.
  
• Don't keep reinventing the wheel, use templates.
• Realize that legal advice is only half their job, producing usable d0cuments and accurate property settlements is equally important and requires proper computer skills.
• If they can't or won't do it, then delegate it to competent support staff or outsource it to a divorce trained CPA.
  

Status: Second Draft - Last Updated 12/13/08 6:30 PM