Saturday, June 02, 2007

A Lonely Trip to the Zoo

When my son brought home the information on the Zoo field trip, it contained a volunteer form. He was excited when I filled it out, you'll come with us. Sure I said.

I volunteer when I can. On one Zoo field trip I helped stop a child from running away during Lunch. The teachers were grateful that I noticed him straying away from the group and quickly got up and caught him before he got lost in a large public place.

As the time approached for the field trip, my son told me, that they picked different volunteers. I said, maybe I could come and tag along, "But Daddy you aren't invited". I had plenty to do, I could have stayed home and made a dent in my Post Decree Implementation. Who am I kidding, I would have been depressed that I wasn't with my son and his classmates.

Well just take him to the Zoo another day, you might say. But see part of my extorted Parenting Plan restricts me to driving my son only 10 miles. The Zoo is 15 miles away. Why the restrictions? Well 3 years ago an untreated condition caused a severe accident. In that three years the treatment has been successful with 50,000 incident free miles. So why still have the restriction? Vengeance, Harassment, Control. Not my answers, everyone who's familiar with the case. Oh yeah and her lawyer has a "License to Fuck Me".

So I pushed myself. Just go, maybe you'll luck out. I went, it was the day after the holiday and the lot was full of school buses. I walked rapidly through the various areas, slowing down occasionally, hoping to find him. The class split into smaller groups, I came across one of the groups, and one of my son's classmates came up to me excitedly telling me about one of the exhibits.

So I spent a half day searching without luck. I went home and to meet my son at the bus stop. Feeling like that overheated Polar Bear at the Zoo. We did talk about the trip, what we each saw, and I showed him the photos I took that day. He said the Polar Bear was "awesome". I like it too.

I've had more fun at the Zoo, photographing animals, and with my son. But I guess you have to settle. That's just part of the damage that comes with every divorce.

This was the last volunteer opportunity of the school year. So his teacher batted a perfect 100 and rejected every single volunteer offer I made. More damage.

Alternate title: Trying to make lemonade

8 comments:

Lara Croft said...

That sucks !
I would put in a formal complaint to the school JQ suggesting you feel that they chose to ignore you and you feel victimised. I know it sounds extreme but I have found ( working in a call center) the biggest whingers who claim to be offended, victimised, personally attacked, recieve much more consideration than those who just sit back and wait for a turn.
Be a thorn up thier ass and watch them jump hoops to shut ya up lol

Lara Croft said...

Great Pic btw

JQ75 said...

Well, I was a little slow to catch on. And I wanted to think it was nothing personal. But them I saw my ex in action just after this Zoo trip at another school event (upcoming post).

Ah ha, no accidents, she was actively lobbying against me. The social collateral damage of people needing to take sides.

I had an advantage before with teachers as I was known to them, his teacher this year was new to this school.

It just means I have to get a jump on her at the next school year, so they can see that I'm not some ogar that she must be describing me as.

It does suck, but I do have allies in the guidance counselor, the principal, his prior teachers. So I think I would take the I don't understand why subtle approach first. But yeah there is always the indignant approach.

Do you know that at a teacher's conference my wife referred to me as Mr. [lastname]. I looked at my wife, called her by her first name and said I think we can keep it on a first name basis, you can call me John.

is that odd or what? It's not like she's introducing me to a child who'd use that formal reference. She was using it for me.

Glad you liked the pic, click here to see some more.

Lara Croft said...

I think ya ex is just plain ODD actually. Clearly has issues.

Yes the nice approach is probably a better approach lol

Determined said...

Ugh, this post is upsetting despite the nice pictures. I agree with Lara.

The restrictions and the license to fuck are just too much. I'm NEVER getting married again. What fucking a joke.

JQ75 said...

Oh, don't you know it Sol. Of course there is that old song, why do fools fall in love? LOL.

How ironic that the broken divorce system tears people down to the very core that they can no longer fully trust again.

What a sad world we live in that this is allowed to exist at all. Broken love is bad enough, but our evil system even destroys the capacity to love.

Determined said...

yep - I hate marriage, I hate the system, and I hate the way people take advantage of you when they see you're going through some trouble. They're all like sharks swimming around our raft after shipwreck. Lawyers, wanna be boyfriends and girlfriends, "friends", employers, etc etc.

Only a person who's gone through a similar experience would understand. Not the cheater, not a third party, not a lawyer, not a therapist - no one. If you haven't been cheated on or divorced against your will you'll never understand the psychological harm that's induced.

For this reason I will never get married again, and I'll never give my heart out to anyone. It's almost offensive to think about it.

Little Wing said...

John, this post brought tears to my eyes. I felt like crying imaging you looking for your son at the zoo, which you weren't invited to volunteer for,
that thought just hurts ....it is just one of a long list of ways you have been screwed in all this. And not in a good way.

Solaris, I understand how you feel and where you are comming from, but please don't let your ex destroy your capacity to love. That would mean he won.