Yep, 2 years ago, during my son's spring break, as my son lay sleeping in bed and my brother and I were building a PC for my son, I heard a sound from his room. It was my wife, she'd been gone all day, and quietly came into the house, went to his bedroom and was taking him out of the house.
For over one week, I would not know where he was, or how to contact him.
During Summer 2005, only 4 hours visitation on my days off.
For Christmas 2005, only two days before Christmas, my wife's lawyer tried to revoke visitation for Christmas, I forced my lawyer and the Custodian Evaluator to continue arguing through Christmas Eve. They had another choice that would have suited me better and that was to involve the judge on Friday and get an emergency order. They chose to do it without the judge because the judge has shown a tendency not to want to make decisions. Funny, I thought that was the main part of their job function.
In 2006, my 2nd lawyer got my visitation extended from 4 hours to 8 hours on Mon, Tue, Wed. I worked weekends and my son is in school those days, so it only mattered on his days off.
On Sunday, before Spring break 2006, my wife calls me up to inform me that I would only see him 4 hours per day during his spring break. My wife's lawyer was supposed to journalize the new visitation and never did.
For the second Summer (2006) in a row, we only had 4 hours visitation on my days off.
My wife's lawyer had to outdo herself for Christmas 2006. I was extorted to sign a parenting plan that the Guardian informed the judge was "disgusting" because of how restrictive it was against me and she didn't like me because I fired her friend. On Wed before Christmas a Fax was sent to my lawyer to sign it or no Christmas visitation would occur (since Christmas was on a weekend, and I have no visitation on the weekend). I signed it after seeing that the judge would not act and at $20K, I could not afford to go on much longer.
In 2007, there appeared the distinct risk that my wife's lawyer would renege on the $20K parenting plan and cause the whole process to start over. Finally after applying extreme pressure to my lawyer, I got the parenting plan ordered so she could not backpedal any further.
That brings us to the present, the start of my sons third spring break in 2007. Again only 4 hours, only a few days.
For the third Summer (of 2007), well that is hard to say, I will have to go through three months of supervised visitation and pay another $10K in fees to reach the goal of 50/50 visitation for summer. I'm not sure that this can be achieved before June, maybe part way through the summer.
What kind of damage does it do to a boy to be ripped from his father and have so many restrictions for 3 years? Time will tell. Some people say they are young and adaptable and they'll recover easily, these people are high or full of shit. And that does even count the stolen legacy courtesy of the disastrous system.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
4 comments:
2 years - that's ridiculous. You've labeled this post correctly - "legal abuse" that's exactly what it boils down to.
My lawyer says I should have the final decree this month (25 months).
Its all bullshit, you'll see more in my divorce disagreement details upcoming post.
But even after that, I don't have reasonable access to my son, so that will be the next phase.
Sometime, I'm going into this pre-trial waiting game / forced settlement process in more analytical detail to expose the big fraud that it is.
Nothing to say really JQ....just frustrated for you....life's too short for this BS.
I'm so sorry for you and your son....I hope stbx wife (what does stbx stand for? is that like 'shitbox'...hmmm doubtful)....sorry, I WISH your wife could see what she's doing to your son.
You're a big boy with life experience....you can cope (not to discount your pain and suffering JQ), but your son is an innocent child being shaped in some ways (no matter how far removed she may think they are)by the decisions/actions of his mother and whatever she thinks the final decree will be. I mean REALLY?....will it be worth the cost? Not just the financial, but all of the other resources and the most important being the "wellbeing" of your child!!
Did I say I didn't have much to say? Just wind me up!!!
Thinking of you JQ. Best of Luck...will look to the next episode.
Over 2 years is a lot of an adult life to waste, but when you think of what a child misses in that time, or what a parent misses in the child's growing up in that time, it is enormous.
stbx = soon to be ex-spouse. Most people use this term when they file for divorce, but nothing has happened "soon" in this case, so I still refer to her by the legal status as "wife". One of my posts joked that they need a different term for someone when they didn't act like a spouse, but there was no way of knowing when the divorce would be over.
Will it be worth it? Only in the sense that she will have extracted the revenge on me she wanted. But she would have faired better in mediation, if only by saving the huge legal fees that she could have had a piece of.
And the latest surprise is her lawyer is likely to seize my settlement to her before she even has access to it. On principle, I'll object, but my lawyer and hers have no doubt agreed on this already.
Post a Comment