My Lawyer Sends me on Goose Chase

Many people my age and younger have grown comfortable with online banking. I've done it so long, I've forgotten how to pay bills any other way.

From a very practical point, as you come under the financial pressure that is inevitable with a divorce, the convenience and quick turn around of online banking almost becomes a necessity.

I have been arguing for release of my separate assets for months. Last month I received a court order for partial release of my separate funds. My lawyer went out of town and let it sit, then he deposited my funds into his escrow account. He claims he can not do an electric transfer out of his account.

He would not release any of my funds to me until I provided him with individual bills. I gathered 20 creditors bills, scanned them and sent the PDF file to him. Then he wrote individual checks for each creditor to that creditor.

Now if creditors were current, I'd simply buy 20 stamps, lick all those envelopes and mail them. You may guess that when you are 3 months behind that the last thing a creditor wants to hear is "the check is in the mail". It got so bad that when I tried to ask what to do with the checks, they said "give us a card number or bank routing number", before I could finish the question.

Mailing takes 10 days to process, banks take 3 days to process, payment centers take 1 day, and online banking is less than a day.

What's the rush? I had recieved shut off notices for phone, water, electricity all within 5 days. Yeah, he waited long enough. So I had to pay at payment centers, which these days is a nice word for "check cashing" establishments, a kin to a pawn shop.

The number of creditors who each used different payment centers meant that I would be running around the downtown area with an envelope full of checks, some for thousands of dollars, paying these bills. As any big metropolitan area, there are crime elements, which I'm used to since I worked in a downtown University for 19 years. But I was never dumb enough to be standing in line at these legalized loan sharking establishments with their desperate clients to pay bills. I've gone to the large banks on the square or the financial avenue, where you can reach every major institution by walking 100 feet between each towering building. Each with their courteous and numerous security people visible.

These emergency payment centers on the other hand are small hole in the walls located on side streets and alleys, next to warehouses or garages, where desperate people cram in like sardines to stand in line behind the personnel who are behind thick bullet proof glass, without any security any where to be seen inside or outside.

It was rather depressing to see that these desperate people who could least afford it were being charged 2-3% to cash a payroll check and upwards of 30% interest on a payday loan.

So off I went 40 blocks in the east/west direction, and 10 avenues in the north/south direction (if you know my town well, ask via email and I'll give you the intersections). Four hours later, my envelope was nearly empty, my feet were sore, and I knew why I've been doing online banking. I only had one incident, a potential pick pocket, at one of the payment centers. I've had several pick pocket attempts, only the first one was successful.

Then I sat down to a nice dinner, rested my weary feet before I went home. My son was not able to reach me and had talked his mother to coming over to my home so he could say good night as we have done every night for the last two years by telephone as ordered by the court. Why, I wondered was he unable to get through? Because my phone was already disconnected. Guess today was one day too late. Great, now I have to fix that.

Thank God, for my wonderful son, who had to say Good Night to Daddy.

And a big Fuck You to my wife and her lawyer who have been screwing me for two years and a Special Fuck You to my own asshole pussy lawyer who sent me on this unnecessary goose chase.

Laugh now pussy, laugh it up good, I will laugh last.

So that was my March 30th, second anniversary of my son's kidnapping. Hopefully 2008 will be the year of normalization.